Strippin’ 101, by Tony Wills, Lesson #01, Significant Others in the Club:
Listen up, guys and girls. As a 15 year veteran of the “Gentleman’s Club” (aka: Strip Club, Adult Entertainment) industry, there are many bits of wisdom that were imparted on me, and that I learned along the way through trial and error. Periodically I will be posting these short blogs here, with a follow-up video and/or audio blog to follow with more expansion.
I want to begin with an issue that seems to be completely out of whack these days. The issue of boyfriends (or girlfriends) being present while you (the stripper/dancer/entertainer) are trying to do your job, and let’s face it, it is a job after all.
For the sake of short-hand writing, I will now refer to these parties as “SO” (Significant Other, duh).
The #1 issue, above all else, is the jealousy factor. You may think that your SO is just not the “jealous type,” and it will never be a big deal for them to watch you work. You would be wrong. Yeah, at first they may be cool with it, but heed my words. You’ll find this out especially with young guys (18-25 years old), though I wouldn’t say it’s exclusive to them.
The problem is (one thing girls just don’t seem to know/notice/understand) to them you are a mere trophy. Oh sure, they may tell you that you’re their world and you’re so awesome, “blah blah blah barf,” but make no mistake, when you’re not around it’s a different story with their buddies.
“This is my homey ‘So&So’, you know that hot blonde ‘Mercedes’ at Vu with the sweet ass and perfect tits? That’s his girl! Dude pulls mad gash, yo!” Says the best friend while introducing him to new friends.
People still say “mad gash” and “yo,” right?
Anyway, if he’s a somewhat modest guy he may only blush a little and say,
“yeah, dawg, dat’s me.” People still say “Dawg,” right?
However, most young guys I’ve known in the past will not hesitate to spill some saucy beans about yours and his/her private life.
They are immature, and eventually their ego becomes so inflated that they’re with such an attractive female that they become possessive. Then the jealousy kicks in.
Suddenly you may notice that they try to distract you at work, try to hog all of you’re time so that you can’t show attention to any other guys. Because, after all, they are the only ones that deserve to have you and no other guy is allowed to snatch that trophy away. Even though your customers pose nearly 0% threat, they see it as someone else holding their trophy, which can lead to nasty drama.
I’ve seen boyfriends pick fights with customers because they got a little too handsy on a lap dance, or maybe leaned in a little close on the tip rail to get a good look. I’ve even seen a guy get mad because he came in to see his girl and she was in the VIP room with a customer and wouldn’t come out to greet him when he got there. SMH, come on!
If you truly want to make some good money at this job, ladies, and want your shifts to go smoothly, you have to eliminate distractions.
And that brings me to point #2…
They will distract you from making money!
This was technically the biggest reason that managers I’ve worked for over the years had this “no boyfriends/girlfriends in the club” rule. The girls who would disobey this rule, and get away with it for a while, would go almost every night without making even enough to pay their basic payouts. Most would either be fired for not making pay out, or for eventually being caught, because management noticed that they were sitting with this one specific guy (that never spent money on her) every night.
Above all else, you can’t forget WHY you’re an “exotic dancer”; to make money!!!
If you’re going to come to work to only sit with some overly jealous, immature ass-hat, not making money- what’s the point?
You’re not only screwing yourself out of some decent cash, but you’re screwing your DJ, bouncers, the waitresses, bartender and the club/management. Why should any of these people want to do anything for you, when you’re obviously doing nothing for them?
A short point #3 is the sad factor of the whole thing. He/she can’t be without you for 5-8 hours a few nights a week, or vice-versa? And, let’s be honest, isn’t it kind of creepy to have a SO that would want to come to your club and sit and watch other dudes drool over you? Again, it all comes bac to jealousy…unless he’s a cuckold, then that’s a whole other story. I’m willing to bet that not many 18-25 year olds are in to the whole watching their girl get off on other guys thing, other chicks probably, but not other guys.
In closing, I will say that it is/can be different with an employee. Though, again I will say, that is dangerous territory as well. The potential for jealousy and drama is still present, especially if the guy is still immature and in that age group, however, people who work and have worked in the biz for a lil while tend to be a bit more accepting and understanding of how things work. It’s still not the best idea in the world, but I have seen fewer problems…although I would wager that the fewer problems are usually bigger and can completely decimate a relationship.
So, ladies, leave the boyfriend/girlfriend/whatever at home! Go to work, make your money, and come home. If you have a good man, he won’t need to come check up on you. If he appreciates you and respects you, and truly cares for you, he will understand that, at the end of the day, you come home to him and only him. If he can’t even get that basic part of the equation down pat, you don’t need him.
Thanks for reading!
PS: If you’re perfectly OK with being a trophy and you’re not in it for love, no worries, but he should still stay far away from your business. NO DISTRACTIONS!!!